When people take some step to enlarge a fellow citizen’s
property,
or advance his career, there are several different
motives…It could sheer goodwill…respect….
or he may inspire their confidence…
- Cicero M The Good Life: On Duties
“Would you like that cappuccino to be a
double sir?”
I had been walking around the exhibit area
looking for a booth that was serving coffee, and there she was looking for a
customer – need and fulfillment…I like that.
The society to which I have belonged for
the past 23 years or so is made up of pretty high-end performers. Most of them are spine surgeons, preoccupied
with their practices and the economics that go along with this kind of
work. The exhibit areas for these meetings
are huge, and while not all…mostly consist of vendors displaying surgical
instruments and hardware for spinal surgery.
The
meet…
This particular company’s display had an
espresso stand and a smiling young woman doing the job for which she had been
hired – making specialty coffees.
I was the only person in line at the
moment, so while I waited, I asked her if she were a student. “No,” she said, “I have a degree in music,
but have moved home to Chicago to be closer to the family. It is hard to find work in my field, so I
pick up what I can.” Now I was curious.
I told her my older sister taught voice in
Washington, D.C….an opera singer…a soprano…and singing as well, maybe better
than ever in her life. Anne has a solid
reputation and a stable of 50 or so students and a waiting list. I have teased her over the years about being
a ‘semi-professional’ singer, to which she has chided, “I am a professional
singer and teacher!” In fact she is, and
in spite of the fact that I don’t often tell her – or at least tell her enough,
I am extremely proud of her chosen profession and her gift…for truly she is
gifted.
A
gift – a present…
Ah yes, the gift…that brings us back to
this young girl at the cappuccino machine.
I asked her range; she said soprano ….just like my sister…but her
interest was in Baroque music. While I
have little knowledge about different music styles, I’m pretty sure Baroque
carries strong rhythms, consistent moods, with more than one line of melody…I
hope for my sake, and my sister’s critique this description passes muster!
As this young woman talked about her love
of music, the moderately polite and flat look in her eye lit up like a well-decorated
tree on Christmas morning. She shared
what singing meant to her and how she missed performing.
When I asked why she wasn’t singing, she
said since moving back to Chicago, she had been away from the ‘music
community,’ and it just wasn’t the same.
I couldn’t resist “Are you any
good?” I asked. Without hesitation she
replied, “Yes I am, I am very good.” Her
answer wasn’t that kind of uninformed bragging that often comes with youth or
ignorance. It was simply what it was,
and came with a touch of spirit that had painted all over it…”I love this
craft! It feeds me. I miss not being as
engaged as I have been in the past. I don’t
care about recognition…I just want to sing!”
She actually didn’t say any of that, she just said, “Yes I am. I am very good.” The rest is the commentary is what I felt
when she spoke the words. Singing was
good for her…did anything else matter – really?
I told her I had taught university for a
number of years, and always encouraged my students that they could do whatever
they wanted to in life. Maybe in the
field for which they were preparing – maybe not – BUT if they followed their
hearts, they would find their ‘place.’
If they had a gift and faith, they could do anything.
Chasing your heart is risky. When you do this, there is little to hide
behind…little place to take cover…convention makes little difference in matters
of the heart you know…yeah, you know.
A point – for me…
Then came THE MOMENT. The kind that
provides perspective…the moment when you connect with another human being at an
elemental level…where age, training, experience, attitudes, professions, mean
nothing. The unknown, unrehearsed and
unexpected instant when two human beings find an instant in time, and little
else matters.
I asked her if she were gifted…she knew she
was…so I said, “…why aren’t you honoring the gift?”
She repeated her parents wanted her to be close and she felt an obligation
to the family.
I asked her again…
A tear formed in the corner of her right
eye, and a lump in my chest. She said,
“Because I am afraid.” In that brief
moment, we were connected and I mean connected.
“I’m afraid it might not be what I think.” She wouldn’t know, of course, if she didn’t try, and the
only way to know would be to act.
She said, “Wow, I wasn’t expecting
this!” “Nor was I,” said I. “But here we are.” We held eyes silently for a few seconds, and
knew whatever had transpired had meaning…for both of us.
The
moment passed…
I thanked her for the cappuccino – the
double shot – and turned to leave. I
looked back and gently said, “Honor the gift,” and with a smile began to move
away. “I will” she said, “I will…I
needed that, and thank you.”
“You don’t know,” thought I. “For it is I
who should be thanking you.” I smiled
again and headed off, hot drink in hand and a song…a song in my heart…the
rhythm strong; the mood elevated and consistent…the melody, well, in this case harmony and it was close and tight.
What
really matters?
It’s hard to know when one is going to be
rewarded in life…when those small, seemingly commonplace events become
something more…something much more.
I will never see this young woman again,
and don’t know whether the touch we both experience will have any lasting
meaning for her. I can only speak for
me. It often isn’t life’s boulders we
work to move that make the difference in our daily existence…sometimes it’s
just taking a little time to turn over the pebbles.
I wouldn’t know this woman again if I sat or
stood next – nor she me – but maybe one day I will hear her sing. Maybe something that gift reach into my heart
a second time and I will hum along with a little harmony.
- ted
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