“Jesus called them unto him, and said, suffer
little children to come unto me…for
of such is the kingdom of God.”
Matthew 19:14 kjv
Mom and dad were out. She was asleep for her afternoon nap. I was the adult in the house.
Full disclosure. While I have had lots of experience with children, my wife and I have had none. I'm the guy who comes, plays, laughs, hugs, reads before bedtime, and then goes home. There are nuances of child management that can only come from the bone-weary, extended exposure to day-in and day-out child-rearing. Did I mention I’m the guy who comes, plays, etc.?
We, the boys, and I were playing a game downstairs. The speaker on the counter, connected to the two-year-old napping girl, made a slight squeaking sound. The older boy said, “Maybe I should check to see how she is doing.”
A relevant aside…
Being a great uncle, meaning their mother's uncle, I’m pretty good with the kids. There is never a time when I’m not happy to be with these youngsters, but I’m still working on becoming a ‘great’ great uncle! Not being clear on all the household guidelines, I said, “You probably should not disturb her.”
“I just want to check to make sure she is alright.”
Before I knew it, the older boy was on his way up the stairs, followed by his younger brother. A quick check and back to the game. What possibly could go wrong?
The boys were away longer than I expected for a quick check on the baby. Heading upstairs, I discovered the baby was out of the crib. The younger boy was now in it and the older boy was on the floor playing with a wide-awake child who was supposed to be sound asleep! Their joint, 'deer in a headlights' look as I entered the room said it all. This was not good. While not intimate to all the guidelines for the house, this was, no doubt, well beyond the boundaries.
I brought the little girl downstairs, thinking I should play with her since she was fully awake. But, on the other hand, there was a nagging suspicion that this youngster should really be sound asleep in her crib and not playing with her pretty good ‘great uncle.’
Picking up, by now, a fully animated child, I headed up the stairs and back to her room.
What to do?
Turning off the lights, we slipped on to a large, overstuffed chair. I leaned back, with this tiny thing lying on my chest – head up, alert, looking around the room as if she were on guard duty. Fully stretched out with her head at my shoulder, her toes didn't reach my knees.
I had no plan!
Then this primal thing began to happen. I suppose one might argue it was the release of oxytocin (the cuddle hormone), but I was overcome by the wonder of this little one lying there. We were chest to chest, breath to breath, heart to heart. I found myself letting go and channeling my mother…a little humming and singing. I could hear mum’s voice, “Trust the process, Teddy, just trust the process.”
You know the expression, “The quieter you become, the more you hear." I could feel her breaths and heart as she glanced from side to side, eyes dancing. I could feel my breath and heartbeat slow as we fell into an ancient rhythm. She glanced up at me, her eyes a little less focused, a little less clear. Her head bobbed up and down, then softly landed on the runway of my chest…she was out.
Something was soothing about all of this. I wondered whether I should pick her up and put her back in her crib, but for the moment, she and I were connected, joined in a moment of harmony I was unwilling to interrupt. Eventually, I reluctantly lifted and placed her gently back in her crib wondering whether the movement might wake her? It did not. Her lights were out.
My lights? Fully energized. That little girl…those moments shared were pure enchantment.
My mother was right. I understood what every loving parent knows. It was, as it always has been, the whole greater than the sum of the parts. Two souls, bereft of time, bereft of age, bereft of gender, floating together in the rhythm of the universe.
Magic?
Indeed!
ted
