“It’s
almost never the decision itself,
but
the difficult path getting there.”
-
Anonymous
It’s hard to know how the day is
going to start. Yet as long as we have breath, each morning begins as it does
for every living creature on the planet. Sometimes those days are predictable,
but mostly they are not. This day things went badly…and went badly quickly.
The lioness escaped the sudden
events that swiftly unfolded…her cub did not. In the aftermath, she looked
around, and following a whimpering sound located her young offspring. The cub
was not dead, but had been trampled by a herd of antelope or water buffalo or
some other migrating pack that had been frightened by something unknown.
She came nuzzling and nudging the
cub to move, but its lower back was broken – it could not. She picked it up in
her mouth and carried it for a while. Whether it was the weight or fatigue or a
combination…she put the cub down and slowly walked on. For a short period, it
dragged itself along by its two front legs trying to keep up with its mother.
She walked slowly allowing it to keep a distance of about ten feet between
them. Then she stopped and sat…the cub paused, staring intently at her from
behind.
The photographer had captured
this rare and astonishing moment - the camera filming from the side as the
drama played itself out. A second camera found itself positioned in full
frontal view of the mother lion, sitting erect and regal – the cub plainly
visible several feet behind her.
The war between the mothering
instinct and struggle for survival appeared to be in play. The lioness seemed
to be thinking… calculating… considering her options…running through some
nameless decision making algorithm known only in her own mind. They say animals
don’t make subtle facial expressions, but watching her as she sat for those
moments was riveting – the battle between the instinct of motherhood and for
survival…almost in prayer.
Then something appeared to click
in her mind. Something ancient…something primal…something tragic…a realization,
a decision that telegraphed itself through the unseen camera directly into my
heart. Like the arrow released from Paris’ bow heading for Achilles’ heel,
there was no turning back…the endgame clear.
She glanced over her shoulder and
looked directly at her cub…the fruit of her womb…the flesh of her flesh…and
then turned to look straight ahead. She blinked her eyes, took a deep breath –
a sigh really – and walked away.
It was one of the more profoundly
moving and unexpectedly touching things I have seen in my life. It was not what
I had expected. It was not the pleasant “…isn’t that nice…” resolution to a
potentially lethal situation. I did not smile at a satisfyingly haunting lyric
like ‘The Gambler’ written by Don Schlitz; sung by the American artist Kenny
Rogers:
“You got to know when to hold ‘em
Know when to fold ‘em
Know when to walk away
Know when to run…”
It was
stark…real…life…death…decision…choice. All of that played out in a few
astonishingly brief moments. In the most paradoxical of ways, the act was
compassionately courageous. The mother had assessed the situation, tested the
possibilities for survival, and made the most merciful decision for both she
and her cub. The very rhythm of nature that brought the cub to life would now
take it away…neither act either particularly willing or unwilling…simply a part
of nature’s ‘what is.’
As human creatures in our
culture, leaving our young would be unconscionable. As thinking social beings,
we understand the future is not simply about our personal survival. We
understand it is the transmission of conscious thought that builds the
foundation, for our personal future, and that of our species. We understand we
are, in fact, spiritual creatures housed in physical bodies…bodies, which in
some cases not completely whole, hold the most wonderfully creative minds.
There are so many situations in
life where we find ourselves unable to make decisions to move on from
circumstances of hopelessness…the death of a loved one…the loss of a
relationship…an abusive situation…the failure to succeed where time and energy
has been spent.
The metaphor of choosing life,
over the potential tragedy of two deaths, touched me deeply. Making conscious
decisions, in spite of the difficulty in doing so, for a better life…a better
future…all of that has played itself out in the theater of my mind since seeing
that poignant video. Those few moments, calculated on the basis of the instinct
for survival and choice for life, were profoundly touching.
“She blinked her eyes, took a
deep breath – a sigh really – and walked away.”
ted
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